Time to fess up: I am still fat and unhealthy. In fact, I am-- as of this writing-- almost 10 lbs more fat and unhealthy than I was when first wrote about this back in April. I have no excuses, and no explanations other than the obvious, which is that I'm apparently taking in more calories than I'm expending.
It's not surprising. The last few weeks have been somewhat stressful-- like 3 rounds of job interviewing which occurred before, during, and after my graduate exams, and a trip out of town which was bracketed by a close friend's funeral on one end and a PhD admissions interview on the other. At holiday time. So of course I defaulted to the run late--> no time to cook--> eat cheap junk--> gain weight mode. Yeah, I can hear the plaintive music now... over the speakers in the Hellevator. Note to self: that stirring sensation in the heart is NOT a good thing.
So today I decided to do something about it: I went to the grocery store and bought food. This was a big step, as I hadn't been grocery shopping since before exam week, which started on the 11th of December. Also because I had to walk both ways, since our neighborhood has no bus service on weekends. Slogging up the hills with a bag of groceries over each shoulder was definitely instructive-- because when I got home, I weighed myself, and then I weighed the bags.
Before I tell you the result, let me tell you what was in the bags: 2 bottles of wine, 5 lbs of potatoes, 1 bag of small potatoes, one whole chicken, 1 lb of stew meat, two cloves of garlic, a box of tea, a box of high-fiber cereal, a pound of butternut squash, a box of mushrooms (I think I forgot the carrots), a 2-lb bag of sugar, and a 2-lb bag of onions. (Don't worry, I have a whole freezer full of veggies to go along with it). Total weight= 37 lbs. Distance walked= about a mile with groceries (plus the mile up to the store without them).
My total weight: 166 lbs.
Perspective shot: Get two canvas grocery bags, and in each one, put two gallons of milk and two pounds of produce. Try to lift it. That's the amount I carried home. And it's almost exactly the amount of overweight I'm carrying around, groceries or not. And here I thought that seeing my mom in the hospital was a wakeup call.
Eight months ago, when I first outed my lousy health in full view of my reading audience, I was determined to do something about it... but that determination didn't survive the daily grind, let alone the drama that followed (you know, getting laid off right before school started, trying to cope with grad school and a temp job, etc.). Now the worst is over, and the stakes are higher. I cannot, CAN NOT, afford to go through life at 160 lbs plus; not only is it a completely unhealthy weight for me, but the unhealthiness goes against my basic principles. It's time to stop changing the station in the Hellevator and do something about the problem.
Today's walk was a good start. Other walks will follow. So will time at the gym, as I'm once again working in reasonable proximity to the place where I signed up. And though I haven't been the most regular blogger in the 'sphere, I'll try to check in once a week and make my progress known.
Your thoughts, prayers, and encouragement are appreciated.
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Monday, October 22, 2007
Albus Dumbledore Is Gay-- So What?
News flash for those who haven't heard: J.K. Rowling, author of the beloved Harry Potter series, has declared that Hogwarts headmaster Albus Dumbledore is gay. Reactions from her vast audience all seemed to start with an intial expression of shock, followed by either groans of dismay or applause as deemed appropriate. Letters and e-mails have begun pouring in, on both sides of the subject. The announcement made CNN and many major newspapers. You get the picture. It's big, and it's controversial.
I admit that my own initial reaction fell somewhere in the "shock and dismay" category. Not so much because I think there's anything wrong with being gay, but because of the politicization which is likely to follow, and what that's likely to do to the story. Did you ever have an English teacher assign one of your old favorites as a class reading, then ruin it for you utterly by making the class spend hours on what it all meant? That's it exactly.
According to the news reports, it's already started. Melissa Anelli, webmaster of Harry Potter fansite The Leaky Cauldron, was quoted in CNN.com as saying, "By dubbing someone so respected, so talented and so kind, as someone who just happens to be also homosexual, she's [Rowling is]reinforcing the idea that a person's gayness is not something of which they should be ashamed." With all due respect for Ms. Anelli, the statement is technically true, but possibly beside the point. It goes like this: if homosexuality is somewhat normal, then there's no need to keep pointing it out.
Which is, I dare to suggest, why Rowling didn't hit us over the head with it. For the purposes of the story, Albus Dumbledore's sexual orientation is no more of an issue than Lee Jordan's dark skin, the Weasley family's poverty, or Harry Potter's glasses. In that context, it's no more remarkable to show a gay man as being magnificent, wise, and kind than it is to show an orphan boy as being generous, brave, and resourceful-- or to show another gay man as being unrepentantly evil, for that matter. Do the math: if Dumbledore was romantically involved with dark wizard Gellert Grindelwald, then by logical extension, Grindelwald was also involved with Dumbledore. And yes, you could split hairs all day over whether they actually "did anything" (Rowling doesn't say) or whether Dumbledore's love was unrequited (unlikely, as the two young men were supposedly inseparable)-- but if you do, you miss the whole point. Albus Dumbledore was the man he was because he consistently chose to act for the greater good, not because of (or in spite of) his sexual orientation.
Unfortunately, some of the same people who see no shame in homosexuality will also see no shame in reducing a beautiful and complex story to that one issue in order to prove their point. And that would be an absolute tragedy. Yes, Dumbledore is gay. And Lee Jordan is black. And Ron Weasley is dirt-poor. And Harry Potter wears glasses, and Mad-Eye Moody is missing an eye and a limb, and Hermione's parents aren't wizards, and Luna Lovegood is a complete flake, and Professor McGonagall is surprisingly normal, and Neville Longbottom spends half the series as a terrified screwup, and--oh, who gives a damn. They live, they love, they grow, they kick bad guy butt. Enjoy the story.
Friday, October 19, 2007
Oh, for the love of...
This is a topic that probably should have been #11 on the "Help me out here... Part 1" post, but I forgot it. And I was just going to leave it alone, until one of my switchboard sisters here at Global Expertise specifically asked me to add it. Hey, if it'll add 33% to my readership...
And I'm switching back to the hammer, because this particular connection doesn't seem to be lighting up a few of our dimmer bulbs, and I figured a little percussive maintenance might help to fix the problem. Or at least make a few of us feel better.
Here's the take-home from today's lesson: we can't make them talk to you.
We can transfer you to their extension, we can provide an alternate number IF there is one in the directory, and we can give you their e-mail address, but we can't make them talk to you.
We also can't tell you whether or not they're in prior to transferring you. This is partly because they are all adults, and don't need to come to us for a hall pass before they go to the potty. And partly because we are a GLOBAL company, so if they did all have to come to us first, there would be so many people streaming in our door that we wouldn't have any time to answer the phone (see "recruiting").
We also can't run paper messages over to their office, for three reasons. One is because, by the time we get there, you will have run out of patience (or someone more important will have called you) and you will have hung up. Trust me on this one. And the other two reasons are because A) if we did that we would spend so much time away from our desks that the only way we could answer our own messages would be by e-mail (see "recruiting") and B) it would generate a truly obnoxious amount of paper (see "global warming").
If we transfer you and it goes directly to voice mail, that is not a mistake on our part. It was a deliberate setup on their part. When you jump directly back to us to complain about the voice mail, we will be glad to transfer you to someone else, IF you have their name, but we can't make them talk to you.
Corollaries: We can't make them check their voice mail, send a return fax, or answer their e-mail, either.
We apologize for the inconvenience. Sheesh.
And I'm switching back to the hammer, because this particular connection doesn't seem to be lighting up a few of our dimmer bulbs, and I figured a little percussive maintenance might help to fix the problem. Or at least make a few of us feel better.
Here's the take-home from today's lesson: we can't make them talk to you.
We can transfer you to their extension, we can provide an alternate number IF there is one in the directory, and we can give you their e-mail address, but we can't make them talk to you.
We also can't tell you whether or not they're in prior to transferring you. This is partly because they are all adults, and don't need to come to us for a hall pass before they go to the potty. And partly because we are a GLOBAL company, so if they did all have to come to us first, there would be so many people streaming in our door that we wouldn't have any time to answer the phone (see "recruiting").
We also can't run paper messages over to their office, for three reasons. One is because, by the time we get there, you will have run out of patience (or someone more important will have called you) and you will have hung up. Trust me on this one. And the other two reasons are because A) if we did that we would spend so much time away from our desks that the only way we could answer our own messages would be by e-mail (see "recruiting") and B) it would generate a truly obnoxious amount of paper (see "global warming").
If we transfer you and it goes directly to voice mail, that is not a mistake on our part. It was a deliberate setup on their part. When you jump directly back to us to complain about the voice mail, we will be glad to transfer you to someone else, IF you have their name, but we can't make them talk to you.
Corollaries: We can't make them check their voice mail, send a return fax, or answer their e-mail, either.
We apologize for the inconvenience. Sheesh.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Help me out here...Please! Part 2
... But first, a digression.
In my last post, I all-capped the word GLOBAL everywhere it appeared, to call attention to the fact that a GLOBAL company has certain charactistics not usually found in a smaller company; namely, its size. Calling a GLOBAL company and asking for "Michelle" or "the senior VP" or "someone in the IT department" is kind of like going to a bookstore and asking for "that book by that lawyer guy." Umm, could you be a little more specific?
Something else about a GLOBAL company is that we get a lot of job applicants. An awful lot of job applicants. Like a few hundred of them a day, every day, all of whom seem to want personal attention. Note to the concerned parties: you can't have it. Not because you're not special enough, and not because it's a test you have to pass to prove that you really want it badly enough, and certainly not because I Don't Understand The Situation (more on that later). It's because we are a GLOBAL company, and a few hundred apps a day divided by eight hours gives you a quotient of "everybody's busy".
All of that being said, I'm going to stop hammering on GLOBAL, because my arm is getting tired, and anyway, I need to change weapons for finesse work.
If you want to get a job at our GLOBAL-- excuse me, global company, here are some things that might make your life a little bit easier. Put them into practice, and mine might get a little easier too. 'Preciate it.
1) Understand that it's not about you. Ever. I don't mean to be unnecessarily harsh, but we're the ones with the need, and it's going to cost us someone's entire annual salary, plus benefits and infrastructure, to fill it. In other words, we're the customer and you're the provider. You understand that we're going to be fairly discerning about where we choose to spend that kind of money.
2) Do your homework. If you want our money, you should know something about our needs. This is why we have a website.
3) Special note for college students: our different sites have different functions. It's not like a restaurant chain. So, if your field is finance and all the open positions are in big financial areas like New York and Chicago, and not in the little college/party town you're calling from-- there's a reason for that.
4) Another special note for college students: talking with a recruiter at a campus job fair does not automatically give you an inside track to a job with Global Expertise Corporation. He talked to 500 students that day. So did his partner. So did the lady who's up the road at the other college. So did that other guy who flew out to UCLA. You have to go through the system like everybody else.
5) Your contact's name is your key to the city. Don't lose it, or you won't get past the gate. See the first paragraph of this post. In fact, see most of yesterday's post.
6) Believe me when I tell you that there's only One Way Through The System. It's set up that way for a reason. Our recruiters are the ones who did it. They don't particularly want to take time out of their day to break their own system in order to make your life easier and theirs more complicated.
7) I can't help you beat the system. I can't put you in contact with anyone who can. I couldn't do it even if you had a gun to my head, because they didn't give me the numbers. They know that if they did, eventually I would crack under torture, fall to the Dark Side, and call one of them. They did it for a reason. See #6 above.
8) Corollary to #7: I also can't clarify the position description for you, give you the name of the hiring manager, provide feedback on your application, or connect you with anyone who can. That extra "personal touch that means so much" is not going to be an advantage in this particular case the way it would be in a smaller office.
9) No matter how many years you have in the field, what you got your PhD in, what your military rank is/was, or whether you're trying to place a third party candidate, there is still Only One Way Through The System. It is not because you have failed to impress me with your importance; I have spent most of my life in the DC area and I assure you that I most certainly do Understand The Situation. If for some reason you do not, I will be glad to spell it out for you in proper military phonetics.
10) This one's for all the headhunters and executive search agents out there: Don't call me. And if you get me by accident, don't ask me for names. Seriously-- you want me to help a complete stranger poach off the top talent from the organization that graciously provides me the means to live indoors? You know, they used to shoot poachers 'way back when, but those were kinder, gentler days.
Thank you for your consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you at your convenience-- provided you've actually been paying attention. Trust me, it's a skill you'll need here.
In my last post, I all-capped the word GLOBAL everywhere it appeared, to call attention to the fact that a GLOBAL company has certain charactistics not usually found in a smaller company; namely, its size. Calling a GLOBAL company and asking for "Michelle" or "the senior VP" or "someone in the IT department" is kind of like going to a bookstore and asking for "that book by that lawyer guy." Umm, could you be a little more specific?
Something else about a GLOBAL company is that we get a lot of job applicants. An awful lot of job applicants. Like a few hundred of them a day, every day, all of whom seem to want personal attention. Note to the concerned parties: you can't have it. Not because you're not special enough, and not because it's a test you have to pass to prove that you really want it badly enough, and certainly not because I Don't Understand The Situation (more on that later). It's because we are a GLOBAL company, and a few hundred apps a day divided by eight hours gives you a quotient of "everybody's busy".
All of that being said, I'm going to stop hammering on GLOBAL, because my arm is getting tired, and anyway, I need to change weapons for finesse work.
If you want to get a job at our GLOBAL-- excuse me, global company, here are some things that might make your life a little bit easier. Put them into practice, and mine might get a little easier too. 'Preciate it.
1) Understand that it's not about you. Ever. I don't mean to be unnecessarily harsh, but we're the ones with the need, and it's going to cost us someone's entire annual salary, plus benefits and infrastructure, to fill it. In other words, we're the customer and you're the provider. You understand that we're going to be fairly discerning about where we choose to spend that kind of money.
2) Do your homework. If you want our money, you should know something about our needs. This is why we have a website.
3) Special note for college students: our different sites have different functions. It's not like a restaurant chain. So, if your field is finance and all the open positions are in big financial areas like New York and Chicago, and not in the little college/party town you're calling from-- there's a reason for that.
4) Another special note for college students: talking with a recruiter at a campus job fair does not automatically give you an inside track to a job with Global Expertise Corporation. He talked to 500 students that day. So did his partner. So did the lady who's up the road at the other college. So did that other guy who flew out to UCLA. You have to go through the system like everybody else.
5) Your contact's name is your key to the city. Don't lose it, or you won't get past the gate. See the first paragraph of this post. In fact, see most of yesterday's post.
6) Believe me when I tell you that there's only One Way Through The System. It's set up that way for a reason. Our recruiters are the ones who did it. They don't particularly want to take time out of their day to break their own system in order to make your life easier and theirs more complicated.
7) I can't help you beat the system. I can't put you in contact with anyone who can. I couldn't do it even if you had a gun to my head, because they didn't give me the numbers. They know that if they did, eventually I would crack under torture, fall to the Dark Side, and call one of them. They did it for a reason. See #6 above.
8) Corollary to #7: I also can't clarify the position description for you, give you the name of the hiring manager, provide feedback on your application, or connect you with anyone who can. That extra "personal touch that means so much" is not going to be an advantage in this particular case the way it would be in a smaller office.
9) No matter how many years you have in the field, what you got your PhD in, what your military rank is/was, or whether you're trying to place a third party candidate, there is still Only One Way Through The System. It is not because you have failed to impress me with your importance; I have spent most of my life in the DC area and I assure you that I most certainly do Understand The Situation. If for some reason you do not, I will be glad to spell it out for you in proper military phonetics.
10) This one's for all the headhunters and executive search agents out there: Don't call me. And if you get me by accident, don't ask me for names. Seriously-- you want me to help a complete stranger poach off the top talent from the organization that graciously provides me the means to live indoors? You know, they used to shoot poachers 'way back when, but those were kinder, gentler days.
Thank you for your consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you at your convenience-- provided you've actually been paying attention. Trust me, it's a skill you'll need here.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Help Me Out Here... Please! Part 1
After a couple of months trying to find a job that was willing to let me schedule around my classes, I finally landed a position as a switchboard operator/receptionist for Global Expertise Corporation. Not their real name, obviously, because I want to keep this job. Even though it gets frustrating at times, pushing a little button and saying the same things a hundred times a day-- because, you know, usually I'm saying the same things a thousand times a day and pushing everyone else's buttons... (um, that was supposed to be a joke).
Anyway, usually it's not too bad. But then there are days... Days like, oh, say, Tuesday, when about every fifth call was some person who required special handling for a Situation That Was Not Like Everyone Else's (except that it really was, including the part about it not being my job to do their homework), and the other four kept coming in on rapid-fire, so close together that there wasn't even time to swallow a spoonful of chili in between. You know those days... Days where you stagger out the door battered and limp, wanting only to drop whimpering into a comfy chair with a bag of salt-and-vinegar potato chips and watch CSI reruns until your brain re-congeals...but you can't, because you have class tonight and it's going to be seven (!!) more hours until you get home. And besides, you're out of chips.
So, in the interests of your tax dollars not having to support me when my head finally explodes from the pressure of holding my formidable sense of sarcasm in check for eight hours at a time, please take a moment to read these thoroughly reasonable guidelines for dealing with the person who answers the phone.
In no particular order:
1) Have the correct name of the party you're looking for. "Frank Thompson" and "Fred Johnson" are not the same person, and a directory search for one will not bring up the other. It doesn't matter that he's a senior VP. We have about 300 of those, so the description doesn't help. And oh by the way, if you're doing business with a senior VP at a GLOBAL company, then you should be able to remember his name.
2) Likewise, don't call a GLOBAL company and ask to speak to "Bill". Or "Joe". Or "Ms. Johnson." Seriously, go to your favorite online phone directory, or snag an old paper copy from the library, and look up "Johnson." Do you see the problem?
3) Enunciate, or hang up.
4) Use your speakerphone Only For Good. Making me say, "Hello, Global Expertise Corporation" three times while you talk to your executive assistant about what to order for lunch is not For Good. Especially since you're having better food than I am.
5) Ditto for your cell phone. If you have to shout over the background noise, go someplace quieter.
6) On the subject of cell phones, check the number before you return that missed call. If the number ends with more than one zero, chances are really good that the receptionist will have no idea who called you from that number. Our company is called GLOBAL Expertise for a reason. If it was really important, the caller would have left voice mail. If they did, and you were too lazy to check it, shame on you. Shame.
7) Be honest about your motives. You are not looking to "send some information to the director of Accounting." You are trying to get us to do business with you. Tell me that on the front end, and you'll get connected to the right person a lot more quickly.
8) Corollary to #7: if you have walked into our office with the intention of acquiring new business now or at any point in the future, and you do not have an appointment, you are soliciting. Read the sign on the door, and choose wisely. Do NOT try to argue semantics with me; I'm Irish, I rocked the verbals on the GRE, and I have the security desk on speed-dial.
9) Corollary to #8: if you do choose to solicit, be honest about the company you're representing. You "office supply" guys who really work for XYZ Marketing-- I know about you. I'm nice enough not to mention your name on a public forum, but the people who wrote "Why XYZ's Parent Company Sucks" were more than glad to pick up my slack. And you don't even want to know what's going to happen if you get kicked out of our building a third time.
10) Unless you're a policeman, firefighter, EMT, or the nanny of my boss's children, you do not need to interrupt his meeting. I need my job a lot more than you need an answer in the next five seconds.
Got it? Good.
Anyway, usually it's not too bad. But then there are days... Days like, oh, say, Tuesday, when about every fifth call was some person who required special handling for a Situation That Was Not Like Everyone Else's (except that it really was, including the part about it not being my job to do their homework), and the other four kept coming in on rapid-fire, so close together that there wasn't even time to swallow a spoonful of chili in between. You know those days... Days where you stagger out the door battered and limp, wanting only to drop whimpering into a comfy chair with a bag of salt-and-vinegar potato chips and watch CSI reruns until your brain re-congeals...but you can't, because you have class tonight and it's going to be seven (!!) more hours until you get home. And besides, you're out of chips.
So, in the interests of your tax dollars not having to support me when my head finally explodes from the pressure of holding my formidable sense of sarcasm in check for eight hours at a time, please take a moment to read these thoroughly reasonable guidelines for dealing with the person who answers the phone.
In no particular order:
1) Have the correct name of the party you're looking for. "Frank Thompson" and "Fred Johnson" are not the same person, and a directory search for one will not bring up the other. It doesn't matter that he's a senior VP. We have about 300 of those, so the description doesn't help. And oh by the way, if you're doing business with a senior VP at a GLOBAL company, then you should be able to remember his name.
2) Likewise, don't call a GLOBAL company and ask to speak to "Bill". Or "Joe". Or "Ms. Johnson." Seriously, go to your favorite online phone directory, or snag an old paper copy from the library, and look up "Johnson." Do you see the problem?
3) Enunciate, or hang up.
4) Use your speakerphone Only For Good. Making me say, "Hello, Global Expertise Corporation" three times while you talk to your executive assistant about what to order for lunch is not For Good. Especially since you're having better food than I am.
5) Ditto for your cell phone. If you have to shout over the background noise, go someplace quieter.
6) On the subject of cell phones, check the number before you return that missed call. If the number ends with more than one zero, chances are really good that the receptionist will have no idea who called you from that number. Our company is called GLOBAL Expertise for a reason. If it was really important, the caller would have left voice mail. If they did, and you were too lazy to check it, shame on you. Shame.
7) Be honest about your motives. You are not looking to "send some information to the director of Accounting." You are trying to get us to do business with you. Tell me that on the front end, and you'll get connected to the right person a lot more quickly.
8) Corollary to #7: if you have walked into our office with the intention of acquiring new business now or at any point in the future, and you do not have an appointment, you are soliciting. Read the sign on the door, and choose wisely. Do NOT try to argue semantics with me; I'm Irish, I rocked the verbals on the GRE, and I have the security desk on speed-dial.
9) Corollary to #8: if you do choose to solicit, be honest about the company you're representing. You "office supply" guys who really work for XYZ Marketing-- I know about you. I'm nice enough not to mention your name on a public forum, but the people who wrote "Why XYZ's Parent Company Sucks" were more than glad to pick up my slack. And you don't even want to know what's going to happen if you get kicked out of our building a third time.
10) Unless you're a policeman, firefighter, EMT, or the nanny of my boss's children, you do not need to interrupt his meeting. I need my job a lot more than you need an answer in the next five seconds.
Got it? Good.
Still don't understand what the fuss is about? Don't see your particular offense-- uh, situation-- listed here? Then you're probably a job search candidate. Not to worry-- I'll get to you tomorrow.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Long Time No See
...So my last post was in July. No way to soft-pedal it; I've been procrastinating.
I could justify it, perfectly reasonably, by saying, "...well, first I started volunteer-mentoring a friend in trouble, then I got laid off right before school started, then school DID start and I had to try and find a job in addition to studying... blah blah blah..."
I'm not always reasonable, but I do try to be honest. I've been procrastinating. One reason is that I felt like there was a huge, gaping inconsistency in my last post, and I had no idea how to address it. Not that anyone was demanding I explain myself-- as far as I know, only 2 people beside myself have even read it (how sad is that??)-- but I just felt the urge. Blame it on my upbringing. The other reason was because I didn't really have anything to say other than, "well, first I started volunteer-mentoring a friend in trouble, then I got laid off right before school started... blah blah blah..." Hence, no posts.
I tried to address the first half a couple of weeks ago; I started a post and saved it but never got back to it. I guess my subconscious was trying to tell me something. Probably that explaining my need to explain myself is unnecessary and annoying. So I won't bother. And as far as my supposed gaping inconsistency goes--namely, what a self-described Grey Triber was doing in a spiritual workshop anyway--all I have to say is this: I'm Irish. Union of Opposites. Read the profile.
As for the second half, that part where I didn't particularly have anything to say at the moment, it seems to have been a temporary condition. Don't say I didn't warn you. :)
I could justify it, perfectly reasonably, by saying, "...well, first I started volunteer-mentoring a friend in trouble, then I got laid off right before school started, then school DID start and I had to try and find a job in addition to studying... blah blah blah..."
I'm not always reasonable, but I do try to be honest. I've been procrastinating. One reason is that I felt like there was a huge, gaping inconsistency in my last post, and I had no idea how to address it. Not that anyone was demanding I explain myself-- as far as I know, only 2 people beside myself have even read it (how sad is that??)-- but I just felt the urge. Blame it on my upbringing. The other reason was because I didn't really have anything to say other than, "well, first I started volunteer-mentoring a friend in trouble, then I got laid off right before school started... blah blah blah..." Hence, no posts.
I tried to address the first half a couple of weeks ago; I started a post and saved it but never got back to it. I guess my subconscious was trying to tell me something. Probably that explaining my need to explain myself is unnecessary and annoying. So I won't bother. And as far as my supposed gaping inconsistency goes--namely, what a self-described Grey Triber was doing in a spiritual workshop anyway--all I have to say is this: I'm Irish. Union of Opposites. Read the profile.
As for the second half, that part where I didn't particularly have anything to say at the moment, it seems to have been a temporary condition. Don't say I didn't warn you. :)
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Pink and Grey
Recently, a contact on the Gathering of Eagles list posted a link to the forum for an article called "Tribes", by a guy called Bill Whittle. I started reading, and then went on to his other articles... and then it was Tuesday. I remember a sort of a groundswell somewhere in the middle where I took time out to read Harry Potter. Then I went back to Whittle's blog. It was awesome.
Here's a link to the article: http://www.ejectejecteject.com/archives/000129.html
Now, for those of you who returned here after reading it, all I can say is thank you, and I'll do my best not to let you down. My own reaction-- after I removed my lower jaw from the keyboard, bowed repeatedly, and chanted "eeny oony wanah!"-- was to think, damn, if I had a little more confidence and a little less restraint...
They say the birthing process isn't pretty. I'll let you be the judge of that at the end of this article.
In the interests of honesty, if not dignity, I'll begin by wiping the egg off my face in full view of my reading audience. I failed my "detect obvious" check the first five or so times I read that article. You see, when Whittle divides the world into the Pink and Grey tribes, he's setting them up as the Tribe of Feeling Good vs. the Tribe of Getting Results-- not as the Tribe of Emotion vs. the Tribe of Logic. And this is a very important distinction, because it illustrates precisely why I can hear and even resonate with that sort of comparison from Bill Whittle when I can't stand it on a Myers-Briggs test.
I profiled incorrectly, or at least incongruently, on a Myers-Briggs test once, and that wasn't pretty either. I took a modified version of it as part of a workshop a church was offering; we were supposed to divide up by type and do the same exercise one of four ways depending on which type we were. It was an interesting exercise, and I might have just smiled and nodded and written it off as a mild diversion-- except that I got a Xerox of part of the book the organizers were using to run the workshop, and read it on the way home. That was when I found out that the sense of duty and the attention to detail that had landed me in Group C, had kept me solidly out of Group B, where all the creative people in the class were doing all the seeking that had brought me to the workshop in the first place.
I thought I'd been robbed. More to the point, I thought it was my fault. I reacted accordingly. Explosively, but accordingly. The fallout took years to clear.
Proponents of the M-B test will tell you, with a sort of supercilious certainty that you can hear even in the printed version, that it's extremely rare for anyone to profile incorrectly. You are what you are. All I have to say to them is, next time I have to move, you can carry all the boxes full of journaling and writing and exploration and half-finished novels and burning unanswered questions. You do have a dolly cart, I hope?
Actually, that's not quite true. Something else I have to say to them is, quit making stupid assumptions. Just because I have a well-developed sense of duty and tend to serve as emergency back-up memory for most of my friends and family does not mean that I'll best serve the world as an anonymous fact-checker, perfectly content to do the small things quietly in return for absolute certainty of my place in the bureaucratic hierarchy. With the fire in my blood? Are you kidding me?
(Note to Rich and Denise: stop laughing.)
Of course, that's my reaction now-- almost five years later, after my subconscious has had a chance to turn the sour grape juice into something I can drink with a straight face. Yes, I was going down a dark and dangerous path trying to micromanage my way through some really difficult situations, and no, that wasn't particularly good for my creative side. But spending all my time on internal affairs wasn't helping me one bit to get out of those rotten situations, either. Glaringly Obvious Advice of the Day: if you want to reach the stars, you need both the fire and the rocket.
Re-enter Bill Whittle-- one of the few people who can make the Grey tribe sound like people and not like functionaries; one of the few who understands that creativity doesn't belong exclusively to the Pink tribe, and that it can be united with practicality in one package to produce spectacular results. Let me be clear-- probably a third of my wardrobe falls somewhere on the spectrum between "raspberry" and "radioactive azalea", but don't let the t-shirt fool you. I'm not that interested in greater self-awareness or finding validation for my story; I'm interested in solving the doggone problem.
It's not about being special because of what we know. It's about being effective because of what we can do.
Here's a link to the article: http://www.ejectejecteject.com/archives/000129.html
Now, for those of you who returned here after reading it, all I can say is thank you, and I'll do my best not to let you down. My own reaction-- after I removed my lower jaw from the keyboard, bowed repeatedly, and chanted "eeny oony wanah!"-- was to think, damn, if I had a little more confidence and a little less restraint...
They say the birthing process isn't pretty. I'll let you be the judge of that at the end of this article.
In the interests of honesty, if not dignity, I'll begin by wiping the egg off my face in full view of my reading audience. I failed my "detect obvious" check the first five or so times I read that article. You see, when Whittle divides the world into the Pink and Grey tribes, he's setting them up as the Tribe of Feeling Good vs. the Tribe of Getting Results-- not as the Tribe of Emotion vs. the Tribe of Logic. And this is a very important distinction, because it illustrates precisely why I can hear and even resonate with that sort of comparison from Bill Whittle when I can't stand it on a Myers-Briggs test.
I profiled incorrectly, or at least incongruently, on a Myers-Briggs test once, and that wasn't pretty either. I took a modified version of it as part of a workshop a church was offering; we were supposed to divide up by type and do the same exercise one of four ways depending on which type we were. It was an interesting exercise, and I might have just smiled and nodded and written it off as a mild diversion-- except that I got a Xerox of part of the book the organizers were using to run the workshop, and read it on the way home. That was when I found out that the sense of duty and the attention to detail that had landed me in Group C, had kept me solidly out of Group B, where all the creative people in the class were doing all the seeking that had brought me to the workshop in the first place.
I thought I'd been robbed. More to the point, I thought it was my fault. I reacted accordingly. Explosively, but accordingly. The fallout took years to clear.
Proponents of the M-B test will tell you, with a sort of supercilious certainty that you can hear even in the printed version, that it's extremely rare for anyone to profile incorrectly. You are what you are. All I have to say to them is, next time I have to move, you can carry all the boxes full of journaling and writing and exploration and half-finished novels and burning unanswered questions. You do have a dolly cart, I hope?
Actually, that's not quite true. Something else I have to say to them is, quit making stupid assumptions. Just because I have a well-developed sense of duty and tend to serve as emergency back-up memory for most of my friends and family does not mean that I'll best serve the world as an anonymous fact-checker, perfectly content to do the small things quietly in return for absolute certainty of my place in the bureaucratic hierarchy. With the fire in my blood? Are you kidding me?
(Note to Rich and Denise: stop laughing.)
Of course, that's my reaction now-- almost five years later, after my subconscious has had a chance to turn the sour grape juice into something I can drink with a straight face. Yes, I was going down a dark and dangerous path trying to micromanage my way through some really difficult situations, and no, that wasn't particularly good for my creative side. But spending all my time on internal affairs wasn't helping me one bit to get out of those rotten situations, either. Glaringly Obvious Advice of the Day: if you want to reach the stars, you need both the fire and the rocket.
Re-enter Bill Whittle-- one of the few people who can make the Grey tribe sound like people and not like functionaries; one of the few who understands that creativity doesn't belong exclusively to the Pink tribe, and that it can be united with practicality in one package to produce spectacular results. Let me be clear-- probably a third of my wardrobe falls somewhere on the spectrum between "raspberry" and "radioactive azalea", but don't let the t-shirt fool you. I'm not that interested in greater self-awareness or finding validation for my story; I'm interested in solving the doggone problem.
It's not about being special because of what we know. It's about being effective because of what we can do.
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